I am feeling very grumpy and short today.

WHEN DID DC GROW TO BE 1.66m?!?! COME BACK MY SHORT BOYS. And alyson stoner is like 5'2 now. btw after all these years i still harbor a slight hate for her. Fine the fact that she was cole's girlfriend was ttly part of the reason. but she's just annoying. and i hate to admit her dance skillz. anyway i'm stalking her again therefore it leads me to watch the work it video which then led me to hear badonkadonk and think of my hughie. <3 oh and in the i'm really hot video at the beginning the chinese hbic was like did i st-st-stutter and now miley has been xposed. yes i am aware of the sheer irony of that comment.

Omg I really need to grow. I really ave this genuine fear of being short. I was so used to being tallest in my class (girl, anyway) for 587138482940 years. NOW WHAT. I have thirty cm to go. okay at least I need to be 170. I WILL SETTLE FOR THAT. bUT I'M NEVER LETTING GO OF MY 6'4 DREAM. DO YOU HEAR ME.

I'm having a headache and cramps. boo.

i blew all my money on snuff today. then forced mother to go to kino so i could buy the new it girl book and two more chucks. sry2say. i am training to be a wallpaper.

just so people know, i need to buy more books because no one updates their blog enough with the exception of nadia, and even her updating does not feed my intense blog hunger. because of this it also leads me to read gossip sites excessively and be horrified by comments such as "but it's kinda like he lost all that weight and found Pete Wentz underneath." on josh peck.

3:06 in the 7 things video makes me laugh very much. THE CAMERA DOES NOT LOVE YOU BACK. this song is possibly the most irritating one she has ever done. old blue jeans not counted, bc that is HM. JULIA STILES WILL GO ALL SAVE THE LAST DANCE ON YOU, CYRUS. WATCH OUT.

NO ONE IS ONLINE. I give up. I'm going to stone to grey's.

gbye.

finally i'm angry that you think you're too good for me, and finally, i think it's the other way around.

Please watch this:

OMG ICU BEN BARNES. AND YOUR ~VOICE. ohhh the dancing. money can't buy this. thank you for still looking like bill EVEN WITH YOUR HAIR CUT. I really thought it was all about the hair, but no. you and bill without hair still look alike. good grief. except you look less paedophilic than bill does when his hair was all shawt like that.

Okay so about after 6 hours of falling asleep and watching FAR TOO MUCH grey's anatomy and eating, I had a really odd dream. [WAIT I HAVE A PUN. IT WAS A GREY DAY. HARHARHAR. k.]

People involved: Caspian, Syeisha Mercado, Justine, Nadia, Ash, Joyce, Cashie and Xin Yi (Nawt Ong.) And and it took place at Seattle Grace Hospital jsyk and there was open heart surgery.

And then there was something about a formal restaurant and me and Justine weren't allowed in because we weren't dressed properly and then she was ready and left without me (HO!!!!) and then my pants randomly disappeared. the only highlight was that i had some ridiculously cute shoes. Like glittery purple and gold sneakers with fun laces and red espadrilles <3

And there was some reliving of the sneakernight video. Which i enjoy watching in the mornings, tbh. IT GIVES ME DA ENERGY!!!!

Some weird stuff went down. Which I will not elaborate on.

I happen to miss everybody right now. That's the sad part about fridays.

omg major tummyache. I THINK I OD'ed ON MY VITAMINS.

BELLYRUMBLINGS. <-- I can't say this without thinking of dawn. bah.

I think I shall bathe and ummm watch MORE.

Lord i have slept so much today.

Anyway. My battle with impurity is going rather well. Have not sworn since Tuesday at least. And have not said any innuendoes, at least aloud. And am thinking of less now :D my one moment of weakness was reading the pickup lines book. I couldn't help it. Let's do math.

Whatever. It's 4.24am on Wednesday and I'm bored as hell. Aside from hearing my own ears bleed from my crap guitar playing, that is.


The rules say if you were tagged by someone to do this quiz, you cannot refuse.

A) People who have been tagged must write their answers on their blogs & replace any question that they dislike with a new question formulated by themselves.
B) Tag 8 people to do this quiz & those who are tagged cannot refuse. These people must state who they were tagged by & cannot tag the person whom they were tagged by.

#1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Betrayed physically or in a different way. Cheated and betrayed are different things. Anyway, if it were just about me and didn't involve someone else, they'd be dumped. Straight out. Granted, given enough time I could change my mind, because being away from someone makes you rethink. Cheated, however... I couldn't say. I would tell anybody else to dump that person but I can't be sure if it happened to me. Circumstances, circumstances. Like if they got drunk and it was just one night and then were pleading for mercy then I'd reconsider.

#2. If you would have any dreams to come true, what would it be?
Seriously? I'd want to win all the Literature prizes with my incredible books. Pulitzer, Booker, you name it. I want to write the greatest love story since Shakespeare and Lolita but it would be real. Okay totally anticlimactic but I'd want to be a regular teenybopping-fad popstar for a week.

#3. What will your dream wedding be like?
Medium sized. Probably outside, somewhere beautiful. Where the sun shines but the air is cool. Okay early-morning poeticism getting to me. I've been drawing my wedding dress since I was about eight years old so I know what I want there. And cashie would finalise the design for me. Most importantly there will be someone perfect waiting for me at the end. No doubts, just pure joy.

#4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
Slap Izzie Stevens. After that, invest a little over half of it and make the most of that, while giving one quarter to some causes. definitely abused kids. and alzheimer's. and once i have more interest, i'll keep giving a steady sum to different charities. and then of course i would spend a crapload on myself and buying all sorts of stuff for friends and family. maybe property. but most importantly for once i would just go into a huge designer store and buy whatever the hell i wanted. and a convertible. with a rumble seat! hell yes. and then become famous and let the world know of camashie and groocroo.

#5. What was the stupidest thing you did under age ten?
Probably when I was two years old, got the white pear knife or some shit out of the drawer and cut myself for attention. No emo jokes kthanks. Lol and totes cried when my mom scolded me. If you do count age ten though I had this huge crush on this dude and kept turning around to look at him like some fucking idiot and pretended to be looking for something. FAIL.

#6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
The latter, please. I find it a chronic disease where I'm so eager to be with a person but they just don't seem to like me as much as I like them. I love so many people but half the time I do question if three-quarters of them really love me back. Don't ever let me question it. Please.

#7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
I don't intend to wait but do I really have a choice in this matter? You always think you've found someone but then they stop coming to the playground, or think you're a joke, or you just aren't their type. But hey, like Mich Pfeiff said: "If it takes forever, then I'll wait forever." Words of Mcfucking Wisdom.

#8. Would you rather write Miley/D.Lo slash or Rydon.
LOL I MADE THIS HARD FOR MYSELF. On purpose and everything. Ummmm lol rydon. brings more lulz. and i can draw inspiration from nadia's past stuff. TEEMCFREAKINGHEE.

#9. Is there anything that has made you unhappy these days?
I won't say it because someone reading will just feel bad.

#10. What is the worst you've ever felt these days?
Feeling totes oppressed by my family who wants to stifle my opinions and just think that I'm a little girl who knows naught. Also, really guilty on june mcfucking 15th.

#11. What cheers you up the fastest?
People. Even when they don't know what the fuck to say, it is so wonderful when they are just there. It's so easy to forget that there is more than one person in the world who cares, and I like to be reminded.

#12. How do you see yourself in 10 years' time?
As the HBIC.

#13. Who is currently the most important people to you? <-- omg grammar/sentence structure pls. holla@timbaland.
C, C, C, N, J, X, M, A. In no particular order. Yeah I stole that whole enigmatic initial shit from you.

#14. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Cyoot, annoying, clueless, knows more about math than she should, ummm the kind of person who secretly wants me and is far less innocent than she appears. Jk. Maybe not. Oh and is the person my mother refers to as "I CAN'T REMEMBER HER NAME, BUT, YOU KNOW, THE ONE WHO REALLY REALLY REALLLLLLLLLLLY LIKES YOU!!!!" Orly.

#15. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
Love wins every time.

#16. What's the first thing you do every morning?
Lie in bed with my eyes closed to better reflect on my dream. Or if it's a school day usually hit the snooze button and panic 30 seconds before it rings again. Then go to the bathroom.

#17. What is the worst pun you have ever heard?
Courtesy of Alex Yeo: -points to my red hat- I guess we can BERET the hatchet! omfg HAHAHA!!1!11!!!!!

#18. If you could ask anyone in the world a random question, what would it be and to whom would it be directed?
Firstly, I'm sorry I had to go and make this question overly grammatical. Anyway. I would ask Cashie if she preferred a blue sky with brown clouds or a blue sky with mustard yellow clouds. I was actually going to add in something about burnt sienna, but then she'd just pick that. Oh wait no i have a better question: Danny N. VS Clint Catalyst. the true eFagz question. Ah, the only person who would answer every single one of my questions and love them all <3

#19. What type of friends do you like?
They can't follow the goddamn herd all the time, because that pisses me the hell off. Although admittedly some of them still do it but i don't like it fyi. they all have to be funny or I am just not that interested. things in common yada. can't be a brainless idiot because i don't want to hang around you and become stupider kthx. i love people who are at least on the same intellectual level. and even if all my friends aren't like this, some make up for it in one way or another. and all the good ones love music and have some form of taste regarding it. shitcakes that was a long answer.

The 8 people who will be tagged are:
wtebs i'm like unpopular. the only person I have to tag is Cashie and i don't know if cat has been tagged already but i'm too flipping lazy to check.


Lol fail that quiz took 45 minutes to answer.

Cassandra Sim Hui Zhen:

Wherever in Hougang you are rn, I miss you bb!

RT AND HT. [hoodie telepathy.]

Loves you.

I WANT TO FIND YOU AT WURK HURHUR!

yeah that's all I wanted to say. I will not mention anything about feeling cute.

ummm so i'm like in foreign land right now and am not entirely sure as to why I am blogging. just feel this completely random urge to rant about random stuff like omg idk just crapshits.

HOW ABOUT STARTING WITH SLASH. THAT WORKS.

so anyway. i just read the update of stop calling her, my edmund/caspian graphic secks and was not satisfied but squeed anyway. I HOPE IT'S NOT COMING TO AN END, BECAUSE BITCH, THERE WAS NOT ENOUGH SEX K. there was prolly enough sex in it to last a century -hurhurliterally- but i mean i am an ADDICT. Like in a "Hi, I'm Marie and I am a Slashaholic kind of way." I just don't know what it is that slash does to me. I don't think it's just one thing. It's the combination of hotter-than-the-cosmos-can-stand peoples, the situations, the cuteness, the hotness, the satisfaction. But good slash always leaves you wanting more. and more. and more until you can't stand it and have read every result on fanfiction.net and then move onto pointless, plotless willmo/edmund/caspian threesomes!

and now i'm like officially addicted to freaking grey's anatomy. I still don't like it if that makes any sense. omg like seriously most annoying characters evs to grace the earth. but i can't stop watching anyway. it's the fucking curse of dvds. it's like a steady flow of crack and you are just addicted because you know you can have more right now and you get it because it's right there -thurr hurhur- and it feels really good. okay i think i'm actually talking about slash again there.

so i never thought i could get so entirely bored with my own ipod like really. i know i already have like the world's crappiest variety of songs but two weeks with your pod and it's like fuck me and limewire's relationship we need to get back in the saddle, you know?

well youhave officially seen my crazy today. i need the bathroom but my mom won't let me use it cuz she's been bathing for mcfucking ever. <-- OMG SEE I DID IT AGAIN WITH THE MC. freaking hell?!?!

omg i bought freaking dvds. and i randomly bought the orig mod squad series. epic sixties lulz. or was it seventies. and st trinian's. holy fucking HALE, batman, that show owns me with it's kickassery.

anyway my family has been driving me up the goddamn wall. too much family time is HARD. they are so irritatingly condescending and we all treat the others like we're idiots so yeah.

omgomgomg i have to use the bathroom kthx.

ahhh i fucking miss everybody although they won't respond to my texts because yeah that whole overseas expense thing. timezones too bah humbug.

oh and i've been wearing my red beret virtually every day. IT MAKES ME FEEL CUTE. IT JUST DOES. IT'S MY FEEL-CUTE HAT. i can't getaway with it in singapore. well i could try and have everyone go wtf at me but i feel downright cute in it. CUTENESS COMES FROM THE INSIDE, BBS~ ... AND HATS. not to mention my purple hoodie. it has that aura of fierceness about it, you know? life is just better when you have a cobra hoodie. and i'm not saying you should get it cuz then i'd hate you and only i may have the power.

omg i did so much ranting teehee ha ho hiddledee. and on my facebook profile too. epic to the lulz.

k end of post. i need to find a toilet.

PEACE! -like in that damian way when he and janis take cady's walker brothers pancake certificate, but just one so aaron got to say *pause* "ONE gift certificate etc."-

The words slip out, unfettered, unguarded. There's nothing I can do to stop them. They've already taken flight.

It hits her like a slap in the face, the wrinkles that had been so carefully restrained resurge at full force. More words of her own are hot on the heels of mine, racing to replace her belabored breath.

I stand there strong, a defiant child who has been broken too many times to bear the weight of another cautious silence, where the oppression submerges me, dares me to overcome submission. The moment belongs to me, not her, never her, never should it belong to her, where she would twist and turn it all under her control. I gather it between my fingertips and place it in my pockets. I sidestep her swings; though the sentences strung full of slights do not fail to claw at my ears, gnaw at my intestines, hammer at my heart.

Sometimes I really do wonder if she was the reason. Oh, no doubt I hate him too, on some level, although feelings of pity have lately blended into this equation. But did my comment only cause such an effect because it was simply horrible to say, or because it was true?

The world shakes and stings, as she takes control of the moment, takes advantage of it. The red from my cheek comes away on my cramped white fingers, so tangible, so concrete, but my entire life seems like a dream, and I am wrapped up in it's scarred, surreal, swirling bubble.

My rage shrinks away, so that when the final blow comes, I am neither surprised nor immediately affected by it. This word is her favourite, and seems to be alive itself, coloured grey, smelling of death, sounding like the heavy thud of a metal block on a single corpse. Failure writhes in the air, and I patiently await its damage, the tearing inside filling my brain.

I am not, I am not, I scream to deaf ears. The last thing I am is him, not in my voice, my hair, my face or my heritage. Certainly not my life path. Perhaps she can even dictate the moment, but this she absolutely cannot snatch away.

I don't know what to do. My head just brushes the underbelly of the dressing table, and I use my sleeve to wipe away a few rogue tears that cling to my chin, sticky and unmoving, a reminder of everything. A few hours pass, time chugging along resolutely, and I know she will be here soon.

A knock at the door rewards my waiting, and in she pops, wordlessly embracing me, her precious daughter, whom she loves, and is so fond of.

I look beyond, still in her tenuous thrall, and know that I have packed my bags, and am running to where only the stars may chase my ankles, and where I choose to sleep among the undulating night grasses. A sigh is released from my chest, and I feel relief humming in my blood, because I know.

I fold the moment in between my fingers.



Sorry, no skandar picspam today.

Okay hello I feel exaggeratedly exuberant from today's happenings and the gradual order of things. [omg lol Exaggeratedly Exuberant Elena ... [insert cap-like intro]

I believe it is thanks to The Purple Hoodie, which is imbued with heavenly powers that seem to rub off on me.

Ohhh the world. -dances-

Anyway just finished watching new tai teevee, so epic pls. died halfway. buttle opener=i wouldn't mind.

Hmm well LD was fail once again today. Give me something to sing about, Renee bb. But due to my general state of goodwill, I simply escaped to Hoodieland and guilty pleasure-d. Then came home, marathon tuitioned, got bitten by giant mosquitoes, came home again, stoned and guitared.

LOL OMFG BEHOLD THE GENIUS OF LE CASHINATOR:

YOU CANT USE BILL BECKETTS FACE ON THE POSTER TO CON INNOCENT LITTLE TAI FANS, NARNIA BITCHES!
~~~~~~~~~~
Caspian: "THOSE ASSHOLES WANNA TAKE OVER NARNIA?! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~ NOW WEVE GOT A BIG BIG MESS ON OUR HANDS!!"



I can't stand Cashie's win, pls.

Tootinghoo. I haven't much left to blog about. Except that today I came up with a random storyline about a psychic girl who is conflicted between morals. well it's going to be funnier than it sounds.


IT'SGOTDAPOWAH!